An Insider's Guide to Navigating the Fine Dining Restaurant World
By Meshelle Armstrong
By Meshelle Armstrong
“There are definite procedures to ensure a positive dining/restaurant experience. It all begins with this idea: Prepare for good dining karma.”
- Restaurant Eve Service Manual
How to Give (and Get) Good Phone – Part I
* How does your husband make such and such?
* Where did you find those lights?
* Do you think I could work in the kitchen for a day?
However, the one I am asked most often still catches me off guard:”What are the chances of getting a table at your place this weekend?!?”
And I’m thinking to myself, “Eeeks, not so good.” And I’m telling myself, “Make something up, quick, then run away and hide.” All the while smiling cheerfully, as I’ve trained myself to do.
After the internal panicking and outward smiling I make a joke out of it, like, “Even I can’t get a table.”
I have to let them down easy—They want to give me money, right!?—so I gently advise them that the best way to get in is to call. The hosts are pros and if you are a teeny bit flexible, if there is any possible way, they will find you a table. I then shoot them a heads up with a, “Pretty please can you do your best to find these nice people a table?”
Which is a bit silly, because they would do that without any word from me.
Or, I could (as I’ve seen nearly every fledgling restaurateur do) call my restaurant and bully the host staff to make the non-existent reservation for Monsieur “I Didn’t Plan.” In my very early days as a host I often suffered the chaos that came from an owner’s swift “make it happen” demand, so you’d think that once I became an owner I’d have learned my lesson.
But no.
The first time I required my hosts to make the impossible happen, I realized that some things are called “impossible” for a reason. The on the spot scrambling caused tension with the managers and upheaval in the ranks of the wait staff in what would have otherwise been orderly service.
Square peg, meet round hole—there was NO table to be given.
The kitchen was pushing out courses, and the floor captains were practically pulling plates from under people. Didn’t work. And all we accomplished was to make the hurry-‘em-up-so-we-can-make-the-turn table real cranky. And the pair I was trying to impress drove all the way to the restaurant only to find no room at the inn. They were kind, and no one said it but they, my hosts and, at that point, myself were all thinking: Idiot. No doubt the wait staff had a slightly different word pursed on their lips.
A host at the newest, gotta-get-in-there hot spot is one of the most powerful people of the moment. But, as we all learned from Spider-Man, with great power comes great responsibility. Hosts speak with hundreds of people a day, helping would-be patrons make reservations for everything from business pitches to proposals. Everybody has a story; everybody’s reservation is important. But good hosts understand that you are trying to make this one, and only one, reservation, and get that the stakes can be pretty high.
Hate the reservation game? If you didn’t, Open Table wouldn’t be as rich as they are.
Sometimes the reservations process can seem so annoying to people (who just want to be able to eat without having to hash out their life story, after all) that it sours the whole experience before they’ve even arrived. When I sense guests getting frustrated with all the fiddly but necessary details of making a reservation—“Would you like the Bistro, or the Tasting Room? Are you celebrating a special occasion? Blah, blah, blah?”—I want to reassure them that I’m here to help and not to annoy.
So let’s all take a deep breath, picture ourselves in our happy-Zen place and repeat together:
“Oohmm, Hosts are here to help and not hurt you. Oohmm, Hosts are here to help and not hurt you.”
Are hosts a restaurant’s gatekeepers? Yes.
They’re the ones who tell you, “I’m sorry, but the only available tables available are at 5:30 pm or 10:15 pm.” They can also be advisors and powerful advocates. Hosts must be diplomats, strategists, traffic controllers and jugglers, and a good one is worth his/her weight in Open Table points. I don’t mean to make it sound like hosts have the roughest job in a restaurant. All restaurant jobs are special snowflakes in terms of difficulty. But hosts get my special attention because this is where our relationship begins. The initial interaction between host and guest is like a courtship—our first chance to make you fall in love with us.
Getting a prime time reservation on a weekend is a challenge. Whether or not you get that one available table for two at 7:30 pm is up to you. Setting out on Thursday to book a “hot table” for Saturday night already puts you behind the eight ball, but if you are determined to continue I’ll start with the best insider tip I can give you when calling for a reservation…
DO be polite
Shocker!?
I’m sure some of you are rolling your eyes. But a surprising number of restaurant goers don’t seem to realize how important this is. Copping an attitude when a host doesn’t give you what you want isn’t just rude, it’s also totally ineffective. No matter how mad or how mean someone is, a seasoned host has just had to “talk down” someone even madder or meaner. So rudeness won’t make a table magically appear, and it certainly won’t make the host go out of her way to help you.
I know how frustrating it is when you can’t secure the reservation you counted on. Maybe you already bought theater tickets or booked the babysitter but neglected to make the reservation. There is a saying that my husband often repeats to any staff member unfortunate enough to complain to him about being unprepared:
- Host (still stuffing menus at 5:28 for 5:30 reservations): “But Chef, we’re not ready!”
- Chef: “A lack of planning on your part doesn’t constitute an emergency on mine.”
Rough, but true.
So if you find yourself in that “I didn’t make my reservation early enough” position, you want to be sure that you are that person who makes the host want to work harder to make things happen for you. So be real nice and…
DO know when to call
While a host’s job is to, well, be a host, try to resist calling during the “rush” of dinner service (usually 6:30 pm to 8:30 pm). You might not know it because the host is nice as pie, but when you call during the dinner rush all she really wants is to get you off the phone so she can greet the people standing at the host desk, glaring at her.
If you’ve been on the receiving end of the outstretched “just a minute” finger, you know how frustrating it is to be ignored in favor of a phone call while you are standing right there. Your host has to choose between letting you (because you called during the rush) languish on hold, or ignoring her guests while yet another caller (who also called during the rush) asks her to check next Saturday (which, oops, simply won’t work for Charlie) and the next (which doesn’t work for Lucy), or making all of her callers wait while she attends to her guests.
I get it: you want to call when it suits you. You are the customer.
But think about it: your host, even multiple hosts, may not have the time to give you the focused attention you might need to score that important reservation while she is managing a complex dinner seating filled with anniversaries, birthdays, food allergies, couples waiting at the bar, flowers for table 41…. Chances are you may hear, “I’m sorry, but there is nothing available,” when maybe, if she had enough time to concentrate, she could figure something out for you. But in the middle of the dinner rush, there simply isn’t time for a proper, creative “table juggle.”
I’m just sayin’.
Me, I call in the morning (9:30 am to 11 am, before lunch). Or between lunch and dinner (2:30 pm to 5 pm). Or at 9 pm after the late reservations have been seated.
But not during the rush.
And never, ever on a Friday or Saturday night. That’s just like sticking a fork in the host’s eye—especially since they expect an industry person to know better.
DO have alternate dates or times in mind
Even if you have timed reservation availability down to the minute, sometimes someone else will beat you to that prime table. Competition is fierce: Never underestimate your competition for those prime spots. It’s best to at least have a couple alternate dates or times that will work for you and your party or you’ll just end up playing the “try this date” game with the host, and those are 10 minutes you will never get back. Enough said.
DO ask to be placed on the wait-list
This is not a fictitious list that we pretend to add you to. We use it, and use it often. People do cancel on the morning of their reservations, and when that happens the first thing hosts do is go to the wait-list. We call the first numbers and work our way down.
So when a host asks for a number, leave one where she can actually reach you.
Don’t give an office number if you will not be there. Sure, she can leave a message after the tone but by the time you receive it, the table may, sadly, be gone. A mobile number, now that says: I want that table.
DO let us keep things fair
Most restaurants have very specific policies about how far in advance they open their books. It’s different for every restaurant; Restaurant Eve has a two month window. That means if it’s a reservation for June 1st you want, it will become available April 1st.
So kindly don’t fuss or pull the “Oh come on, it’s only a couple days away” guilt-trip. Kindly call back. This is how we keep the rezo playing field fair.
And without orderly rules, you know what happens: “Oh, and I can’t take your reservations for Valentine’s Day 2014…”
Nothing personal, but things happen, plans changes, and unfortunately you could even break up. (Some couples don’t even make it through our standard two months.)
DO mention special circumstances
* “I know I’m being kind of picky, but I have to get a babysitter for my newborn and we live an hour’s drive away. I wish we could be more flexible, since we really want a table!”
* “My husband and I celebrated our first anniversary there and we’d very much like to come for our second. Please call us if you have anything open up. Really anything, we’d love to return.”
* “My son’s graduation ceremony isn’t over until 5:30 pm, and our daughter is only nine so she can’t make it much past 10 pm. I know it’s a stretch, but do you have anything for four between 6:30 pm and 8:30 pm?”
Now I’m your rah-rah girl. Now I am rooting for a table to open up for you.
Knowing that prime reservations are tough and revealing the real reason you can’t be more flexible with dining times will go a long way to getting a harried host to fight for you.
It shows that you “get it,” and that you trust that she is doing her best to help you. Your graciousness will make her that much more likely to go the extra mile for you.
As harsh as it sounds, remember that everyone has a birthday and eeeevery one wants to eat at 7:30 pm. And keep in mind, none of these strategies will work if you lie, act demanding or entitled.
So please: always mind that first DO.
If you practice these recommendations, chances are you will see a marked improvement in the reservations aspect of your dining karma.
–Meshelle Armstrong, co-owner Restaurant Eve, Eamonn’s a Dublin Chipper, PX, The Majestic, Virtue Feed & Grain, Society Fair. *Thoughtfully guided by her darling and faithful ex-reservations manager, Kate Ahner*
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Original article published in Northern Virginia Magazine
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